Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of Pupil: Life imprisonment ... Read more

Teacher: In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia ?Pupil: Holding up the telegraph lines ... Read more

Teacher: Name two pronouns ?Pupil: Who ?, me ... Read more

Teacher: Johnny, you know you can't sleep in my class.Johnny: I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I ... Read more

TEACHER: Jackie, take 932 from 1,439. What is the difference?Stella: That's what I say, what's the ... Read more

Teacher: Is Lapland heavily populated?Class: No, there are not many Lapps to the mile!Teacher: Name an animal that lives in Lapland!Pupil: A reindeerTeacher: Good, now name another.Class: Another ... Read more

Teacher: In what part of the world are the people most ignorant ?Pupil: Hong KongTeacher: Why do you say that ?Pupil: That's where the atlas says the population is most dense ... Read more

Teacher: In music, if "f" means "forte", what does "ff" mean ?Pupil: ... Read more

Teacher: This note from your father looks like your handwriting ?Pupil: Well, yes, he borrowed my pen ... Read more

Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week, what have you got to say about that?Pupil: Thank heavens it's ... Read more